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2016-10-28 - 6:46 p.m.
impending
"do not, do not be afraid," marina abramović's voice buzzes through the radio. i push my forehead down onto the steering wheel, take a slow, deep breath. there aren't any migraine medications safe to take during pregnancy - only tylenol, which is a joke. my mom rummages through my kitchen cabinets and sends me a long series of text messages warning of the dangers of dairy, gluten, legumes, cruciferous vegetables, mangoes, apples, processed foods. she has an out-of-character weakness for crackpot diets. old ladies in the grocery store put their hands on my stomach and tell me i should be wearing more clothing around my midsection. the baby settles lower. i finish this week's lectures, bind off a tiny pair of socks and cast on a tiny sweater. the crib is delivered and i assemble it in the room filled with golden autumn light. once an office, now a nursery. on the way home from work, my husband practices how he will drive us to the hospital. just a few more weeks.
* * * reading: a book on pedagogy in the undergraduate classroom. listening to: mort garrison's plantasia. my mom's youngest brother used to play it when he'd babysit us. working on: sewing curtains for the nursery. curtains are my least favorite thing to sew - so much precision, so little fun. in the garden: the japanese maple blazed red this year, not gold. so strange.
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